March 01, 2018

The yolk on my eggs popped. I should have known how the day was going to go.

The day started like any other day...then my yolks popped...ughh

This Tuesday I was pretty excited as I had struck a deal to purchase an 86 951 with fuchs and it was in "excellent" condition. All it needed, per the owner, was some fuel injectors and a tune up!  

But that would have to wait as I had 8 hours of teaching science to do!! My day at school went as it always does, love it! Onward!

So after school I went to go clean out the checking account and most of the savings account!  With that being done it is time to grab my stuff, kiss me wife and head out.... except I can't find my billfold... I mean wallet. (Apparently according to my students the word billfold is an "old word". I'm old. 

God loves me. As I am searching He tells me that the billfold is in the parking lot where I park at school.  I head to school and there sits my billfo....I mean wallet, by my parking spot!

Off I go with truck, trailer and $4k in cash. I am excited as this car will be a fun flip. Fix it up; really make it shine in and out, fully bring it up to snuff, drive it with too high of a price so I can drive it without selling it.... 

Then there is the accident....

So as I am heading down highway 3 in Indiana I come upon a wreck where they are using a sawzall and jaws of life to extract someone. My mind goes to two things. 1. I pray. 2. I'm glad I lost my wallet and that it took me the extra 20 minutes so that I wasn't the one in the wreck! 

 The owner hadn't yet given me the address as I'm guessing he was afraid I would show up early and he wouldn't be home. I get it. So as I am getting close to Austin Indiana, my destination,  I am hoping, and messaging, to try and get the address. I am traveling down some one lane, gravel covered, muddy as it has been raining there for many days, water covering the roads so that I can't backup and had to hope there was a road kind of roads. 

I come upon a man with a chainsaw

Hmmm. So it is dark, I can't backup and here is a guy with a chainsaw....cutting down a tree. I do the only thing a rational guy would do... I get out and help him remove the tree so I can continue on my way. Nice guy. Apparently the tree fell down a couple days ago and if he wanted to use the road he needed to clear the lane, I mean road. 

I finally get the address.

So I finally get to his house (45 minutes later than planned) and as I park the truck and trailer on the road and get out I can actually smell the car. As I walk up to the car it becomes brutally factual that the car that I had gotten pictures of was the same car but was taken some 3,4,5, or 20 years earlier.  It smelled of three things.....1. mold. 2. mouse feces. 3 and the strongest...mouse urine.  As we started to make small talk and he was telling me about the $1000 stereo I opened the door. I wish I could describe it with words but I can't. The smell stung my eyes. The smell immediately attached to every fabric of my clothing and got stuck in my nose hairs. Once my eyes adjusted to the interior I saw mouse excrement everywhere, the seats, the carpet, the dash, the steering wheel....seriously, what Ratatouille of a character poops on a steering wheel? I check the odometer and it reads 428,000 and I wonder in what math universe 428,000 is equal to 105,000 which is what the add stated. I open the hood to see that there were mouse/rat nests everywhere as well as almost every wire being chewed through and the engine itself looks like it had blown a gasket and the coolant had steadily eaten through the head and the corrosion was everywhere. We opened the hatch and tried to read the option code sticker. I truly believe the chemical concoction that had taken place in the car had eaten away at the ink that was used to print the codes as it appeared as a blank sticker.

I didn't know what to even say....  I couldn't bring this car home as anyone in the shop would become physically sick with  the smell. the body was nice, the rims were fuchs but it was done.  I couldn't even give him a low ball offer.

I thanked him for his time and wished him luck. It was 8 hours of my life that I won't ever get back.

As I drove away I wondered how bad it would sting to give my nose a coffee douche and try and get the smell out? 

I ate McDonald's on the way home. 

As my wife always asks me, "What lesson did you learn?" I will ask "When were those pictures taken?" and if the deal is too good to be true......



Taras said:

Yep. That’s how they die – someone’s dream becomes a stinky, rotten piece of metal.


Henry parker said:

I bought a 912 that was really good looking, drove it home and looked under it there. The front wishbones were held to the pan with about 15 drywall screws. But it looked really good me and started up fine. Should have kept the Motor. I INLY list $1500. on that one.


Wellborn said:

Oh that smell. Been there, done that. Welcome to the club. Glad you didn’t get caught up in the wreck.


Jayson said:

I drove round trip about 8 hours once to pick up a 924. Wasn’t anything like the description said in the Craigslist add. I was mad. Made an identical listing that stated the guy was a con artist. He changed his listing to reflect mine. Lol! Sorry to hear.


Malcolm said:

Darn… i hate these stories. Sorry you vwasted your time. Surprised you did make a low ball offer – I mean original early offset fuchs might be worth $1k, and possibly a LSD in it…


Ralph Mullins said:

I know the feeling. I told a trailer from the San Francisco Bay Area all the way out to Casper Wyoming to pick up an antique airplane and when I got there they had a storm the previous day and the airplane was it a twisted mess in the parking area. Bad for me but worse for the owner as he had cancelled the insurance on the airplane the day that I told him I was on the road to come get it.


Donald P said:

That’s better than the check i received from a buyer for my M-B SL500 for too much money and the buyer was more worried about the refund than the car and title. Hmm some thing seems wrong with that. I’m always more worried about the car and title.

David Doane said:

Hi Mark, sounds like a lesson learned …not enough question asking ? been there and havent done that myself..i guess even at our age, you cna never ask to many questions about something were interested in..specially when you have to drive a distance to get there. im sure you will probably run into this again some where down the road..but hopefully not. glad you found your bill fold, my dad used to call his wallet the same thing ….glad you found it my friend…peace, dave doane


David Simmons said:

There is an ’87 944S in Osceola, IN in the same condition. I stop by occasionally to ask if he is selling but “he is going to fix it up”. She will perish long before that happens. Sorry for your luck.

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